Log in

Not Easy (Conan friends, please read)

As the title says, for all my Conan friends on Facebook and Twitter, please read.  This is tough for me to tell you, and it's going to be tough for you all to read.  If you want to post a comment, do so here on LiveJournal, however I may not respond.  You can DM me on Twitter as well, or respond to the Twitter post on Facebook.  If anyone wants, they are welcome to post this elsewhere as well.

Back in November 2009, I was going through a really tough period in my life.  I was so stressed out from work that I would wake up in the mornings before work and have a panic attack right away.  I would try to go to work, maybe get to the parking lot, but could never go in as I couldn't control my attacks.  Therefore, I took a leave, going back to work at the beginning of January 2010.

Still fragile, I did one thing that I've done before to try and cover up that I was still having issues: I became obsessed with something, making it my main focus, making me appear to be in good spirits, when in truth I still needed some help.

Now, I have done this before.  As a kid, I became obsessed with the Mighty Ducks movies, Batman Forever (yeah, that was after a really HARD time in my life), TV shows that I could never miss, music that would annoy my family (then again, my brother does that, but since he's autistic it's a little different).  Many times, I would ignore the things I really loved during this time and my family would notice this, but usually play along with my new "obsession."

So, it wasn't unusual that I would pick up a new "obsession" after I moved back to my apartment and tried to start my life over again.  And that's where Conan comes in.  I got "obsessed" with the whole war, then the tweets, the tour, the Emmy noms, the time leading up to the new show, and, of course, the new show.  But in March of this year, just after March Madness started, I started to realize that something wasn't right and I became depressed again.  I was so depressed that I stopped watching Conan.  I haven't watched since.

I realized that I was using Conan to cover up my real problems, trying to put them in the back of my mind, hoping they would stay there.  But like always, when I do this "obsessing," everything I push back can't stay back and comes forward again.  And that thing I was using to scapegoat everything no longer worked as an excuse.  Plus, I was ignoring the things I really love: animation/anime/manga, sports/baseball/hockey, animals, Gorillaz (still my fave band and some of my fave art/animation as well).

Now, am I saying that I now hate Conan?  Not at all.  I simply realized that my "obsession" was not healthy and I needed to get back to the life that was healthy for me; I needed to get the help I needed.  I needed to get my apartment in order, my cat back with me, more time with my family, more time going to the movie theatre and get back into film (that film degree of mine is just rotting away), and more time with all the things that I really truly love (yes, I know my Twins aren't doing good this season, we lost Harmon to cancer, and who knows when Mauer will play again, but I have Minnesota in my blood and my dad made sure to make me a 2nd gen Twins fan damnit).

I took off my wristband around my birthday, I haven't worn one of my shirts in months, I took down my tour poster, I'm not planning on seeing the film, but I kept my hand turkeys up only because my mom loves them (and she was the one that kept say I was "obsessed" but I never got it).  Now, don't think I won't watch Conan again, but it's been over 2 months and I'm not ready yet.  Maybe when I'm feeling better I will, but when Drew Carrey's new improv show is on at the same time and "Who's Line..." was my fave show in high school, it feels healing to watch some improv. from the old gang.

So, I hope you all understand why I haven't been on Twitter or Facebook in a long time and this isn't goodbye either.  I hope you understand that I need to heal right now.  I hope you understand that I need some real people around me, like my family (good thing, too, since my nephew's coming back up to North Dakota for the month).  I hope you understand that I need to get back to my life they way it's supposed to be.
Hey everyone!  Yeah, I know, I haven't posted in quite some time, but I have been busy with my new job in Fargo, moving into my new apartment in Fargo, and missing my cat dearly (and a little depression because I don't have her with me and there has been so many snow storms down here in Fargo that I can't get out and do anything).  I don't think I'll be able to bring her to my new place until February after I get my tax refund.  But she's with my parents back in Grafton and having fun with their cat Anna.

Well, 2010 was a wild year for me.  I returned to work at Amazon in January, which felt good.  But eventually the stress of working in Seller Support would get to me again in April, so I had to reduce my hours.  Then in July and August, it got to me again and I needed to relieve that stress.  No more Amazon for me come August 12th.

Then again, I was unhappy in Grand Forks.  I had no friends there after living there for 3 years, there was really nothing to do there except go to the smoky bars (which went smoke-free 3 days after I left Amazon), and I just wanted to move back to Fargo/Moorhead really badly.  I had been wanting to do so for about 2 years now.  And now I'm back in Fargo, with a less stressful job as well.

I did have to wait a few months after leaving Amazon before I moved back to Fargo, and it wasn't always the best of times living with my parents again back in Grafton.  Plus the fact that there is NOTHING to do in Grafton and I didn't have the money to go down to Fargo to do things.  But I was with my family and the cats, I had a free place to stay, free cable and internet, and dad would fill up my gas tank from time to time (he still does it when I come home because he just loves to drive my xB).

As for my new job at Swanson Health Products, I'm liking it.  It's more like working in the drive-thru at McDonald's when I was in college, so of course there is less stress.  Also, everyone at Swanson is so nice, always smiling back or saying hi.  That just wasn't something done much at Amazon, but I kind of think it was like this because of how stressful the work was.  Plus, staying healthy both physically and emotionally were not that high of priorities at Amazon like they are at Swanson (I have access to their on-site fitness center 24/7 and I plan on using it, and I get their products at cost, and I plan on using them).

Besides work, I went to my 2nd and 3rd big concerts this year!  In 2001, I went to my 1st big concert, which was Eric Clapton.  Now, Clapton is pretty hard to beat and I would love to see him again in concert if he comes to Fargo (he has come back but I could never go; he came back one year on his birthday even and the crowd sang to HIM), but the two concerts I went to this year were OFF THE CHAIN!

I'll start with the 3rd concert, which was my favorite band, Gorillaz.  I decided to see them in Denver with my sister, who has been digging Gorillaz more and more lately, plus they were playing a smaller venue in Denver and I really didn't want to see them at the Target Center in Minneapolis.  Also, it was a chance to see my nephew by going to Colorado!

While I bought the tickets days before I left Amazon (at the time, leaving Amazon was not in my plans) and I was unemployed still in October, I still decided to go down to Colorado and see the concert there.  AND I AM GLAD I DID!  Our seats were about 5 or 6 rows away from the stage, Damon was having the time of his life, everyone loved the guy wearing the light suit in the balcony (including Damon), and I won the dance-off between my sister and myself!  I don't think I stopped dancing!

I do hope that Damon and Gorillaz will tour again as it was an amazing show and I would see them again in a heartbeat!  Plus, you don't get to see half The Clash, De La Soul, Bootie Brown, Bobby Womack, and Little Dragon perform together in the same concert everyday!  Nor do you get to see some amazing art from Jamie either (although most of the tour only videos are now online since the world tour is over).  Oh, how I wish they will perform on Conan when the new album comes out!

Speaking of Conan, he was my 2nd concert!  It was my birthday present to myself as I saw him 10 days after my 27th birthday in 2010 (May 18th, 2010 will be one of the most amazing days of my life).  I took a few days off from work, enjoyed my favorite places in the Twin Cities, and capped it off with Conan's concert!

Now, I had a front row balcony seat, but it wasn't the greatest because the speakers the tour used blocked me from seeing the video screen.  But that didn't matter because I could still see Conan, Andy, and the rest of the gang (except for Scott Healy, dang speakers again) and could hear all the amazing awesome sauce that filled the theatre!

And if you don't think Conan and Team Coco are humble, well, you are wrong.  His year has been like mine somewhat: some hard downs, but many amazing ups, especially thanks to us fans.  The best part of the show in Minneapolis was when Conan was finishing up a bit and said he didn't know if he was doing the voice of a Kennedy or Mayor Quimby, someone in the audience yelled out "MONORAIL!"  Conan stopped, turned around and told us about how back when he was writing for The Simpsons in a small office, eating Doritos, some 20 years ago, that he had never thought that his life would have turned out like it has. 

Even though he lost his dream job a few months earlier, he was still still amazed that his life was like it is now and thanked us fans for making his life as amazing as it is.  Hell, he thanked us yesterday through Twitter for sticking by him throughout 2010, helping make a bad start of the year into an amazing ending with an even more amazing new show!

As for his new show, it has been so amazing!  It is off the awesome sauce meter for sure and just keeps getting better and better!  For many of us fans, it's like a return to Late Night but with more range.  It was like the Conan we spent the most time with, but even better!  Who knew TBS was so awesome?  I sure didn't!  And now that I have my own place again, I can watch him in HD!  And DAMN DOES HE AND TEAM COCO LOOK GOOD IN HD!

I'm glad Conan is back on TV as my nights can end on a happy note again, even if the day has been rough for me.  I've always relied on late night TV to cheer me up before going to bed; I don't like going to bed in a bad mood because there's a chance I'll wake up in a bad mood.  Conan always was the one that cheered me up the most, so I'm glad he's back to make the day end on a great note again.  Those Coco-less months this year were tough, but thanks to my fellow Coconuts and Team Coco, I got through those months and can't wait for the next new episode of Conan!

As for 2011, I do want to lose weight, save up money to get down to L.A. to see a taping of Conan, spend some time with my nephew, get my cat to Fargo, make some new friends, and hopefully do some traveling, even if it's just around North Dakota and Minnesota.  Oh, and some fishing, I do have to fish! 

But first things first: I'm going to see Patton Oswalt at the Fargo Theatre on January 12th and I have front row seats.  I'm so wearing one of my Conan shirts and since drinks will be served, I so hope he gets drunk.


Bjorn will always be home...

Growing up, I had a cat that was my best friend.  My Bjorn, pronounced like ba-jorn (I didn't name him), was my baby since my family got him in 1995.  My sister found him in a tied garbage bag in a dumpster behind the grocery store she was working at at the time.  He was just a runt of a kitten, but I fell in love with him.

Over the years, as I went through junior and senior high, Bjorn and I would best buds.  He would wait every morning for my mom to open my bedroom door to wake me up so he could come in and snuggle with me.  I missed him very much during college, but whenever I would come home, he would be ready to sit on my lap and purr loudly.

In late 2007, I came home to find that a lump was growing on his back.  It was squishy and gross and was growing to the point where it needed to be removed.  In February 2008, it was removed and it was found to be cancer, and it was one of the worst forms of skin cancer as well.  But our vet thought that he got all of it.

Eventually, May came and Bjorn turned 13, outlasting his companion Peace by one year (Peace got internal cancer and passed away at age 12).  I so wanted him to get to 13 and he did, and was still cancer free.

But by August, the tumor had returned.  During Labor Day weekend, Bjorn had this tumor removed.  I went home that weekend, so I was able to pick him up at the vet, which, even though he was tired and in pain, made him so happy that he slept in my bed that night.  I was so worried that his stitches would come out!

However, the tumor was not completely removed the second time; there was a little that the vet missed.  Thus, the tumor came back fast.  By October, it was already the size of the other tumors that had been removed, but otherwise Bjorn looked healthy.  But by Thanksgiving, the tumor had taken over his body, he had lost weight, and he was starting to have pain. 

I knew and my parents knew that he would need to be put down.  I asked them to do it before I came home for Christmas as it would be too tough of a Christmas for me if I had to see Bjorn in even more pain.  I also asked them to do another thing for me: I asked them to have Bjorn cremated.  He was so beloved to me and my family that I felt he deserved that.

Well, my parents did have him put down about a week before Christmas, however they never told me if they were having him cremated or not.  They did save some of his hair and put it in a jar like we did with Peace.

On Thanksgiving this year, while I was working on my Team Coco hand turkey after dinner, my mom was talking about some of the pets we have had over the years with a family friend that came over for dinner.  At one point they were talking about what they have done with their pets when they have passed and what other people that we knew have done (pet rabbit in the freezer, dead dog in a bucket, yeah those were gross).

Well, my mom said that with all of the pets we have had, they have just left them at the vet after they passed except for one pet.  I stopped working on my hand turkey at that point and asked her which pet.  She said she was never going to tell me, but she told me that Bjorn was cremated and his remains were put in one of his favorite places outside: the field across the street where my dad has his garden.  Bjorn loved to go hunting in that field and it was routine to see him come out of the garden we I called him to come inside for the night.

My mom has hidden things from me before (like when my dad had a heart attack when I was in college, told my sister not to tell me, and I later found out from my neighbor back home who was watching my brother).  But I grabbed my mom's hand and told her thank you for telling me and I agreed that the field was the perfect place for him.

So, my beloved Bjorn is now home forever.  His spirit is most likely in the field now chasing after some mice and birds (although since it's winter in North Dakota now, their aren't many birds around).  But his spirit most likely comes and visits me every morning when I get up, just to say hi and cuddle with me.  Even though I have Ai now, and my parents have Anna, Bjorn just hasn't left and he never will.

Miss you much buddy...miss you much...But so glad you are are home, where you should be...

The story behind my Team Coco Hand Turkey!

Well, I had a good Thanksgiving!  We still have leftovers and they are still so good (my mom makes a mean turkey).  And today, I applied for an apartment down in Fargo!  Fingers crossed that I get it before my new job starts down there on Dec. 6th!

Speaking of turkeys...Let's talk about hand turkeys for a second...Let's talk about my 2nd place winning Team Coco Hand Turkey!

So Wednesday night as I was getting ready for bed, I started thinking of what I should do for my hand turkey entry.  My first thought was to do The Basic Cable Band only on one hand.  But I wanted to include Conan and Andy as well.  So I decided to do 2 hands, with Conan and Andy each being 1 of the thumbs, and the fingers being the band.  I was going to do the last finger as the blimp originally, but later decided on the Masturbating Bear (I thought Bley would like that anyways).

Since I don't draw very good, I thought of cutting out everything with some colored origami paper that I have, but some of the things were also just colored and cut out from plain paper (like the instruments, all the suits, M Bear, and the blimp).  I just colored in the pants for everyone and the palms, as well as added some ears with my brown marker to M Bear.

The right palm was not fun as my marker I was using was dying and leaking at the same time.  I got some of it on the paper, but luckily not on any of the fingers!  So there is some White-Out on there if you look close enough.

Now, I thought of this like an art project from when you were a kid in school.  And what do your parents do with those art projects?  HANG THEM ON THE FRIDGE!  As you can see, I used 2 Lincoln themed magnets since Conan is a Lincoln nerd, then I used my home state of North Dakota, and my 2nd favorite state, Minnesota.  I turned on all the kitchen lights, made sure my dad's camera was set right, and CLICK!  There you go, one Team Coco Basic Cable Band turkey!

I think I'm going to frame it now...

It's A Casio On A Plastic Beach!

Woah, I haven't posted anything in a long time!  About time for an update, eh?

1st off, I HAVE A JOB INTERVIEW ON TUESDAY IN FARGO!  Finally, after months of searching, I am closer to getting a job in Fargo/Moorhead and getting out of my parents' place in Grafton!  For those that are interested, I applied for a call center job taking orders for Swanson Health Products.  My mom regularly orders from them, as does other people I know.  Plus, I know some people that have or are working there and they really enjoy it!  So wish me luck on Tuesday!

2nd, HOLY CRAP CONAN PREMIERES IN 2 DAYS!  I was hoping to have TBS HD by now, but I'll have to setting for TBS SD until I get a place of my own.  And HD cable in Fargo/Moorhead isn't cheap, unless you go with a dish, which I may have to do.  And since Nov. 8th is my half-birthday, I think I'll make a Coco Day cake as well.

3rd, I SAW MY FAVORITE BAND GORILLAZ LAST MONTH IN DENVER!  My 2nd amazing concert in a year, and my 3rd big concert ever (1st - Eric Clapton at 18, 2nd - Conan at 27, 3rd - Gorillaz at 27)!  Plus, I was like 5 rows away from the stage!  I WAS THAT CLOSE TO DAMON!  But alas, I didn't get a high five from him (and he was giving them out like crazy).  So meeting Damon is still on my bucket list, just like meeting Conan.  DAMN MY LUCK!

However, my sister did score me one thing that only a few other people have: THE SETLIST!  I scored one of the hashtag sheets from Conan's show, and I know not a lot of people have those either!  So thanks to my sister to scoring me that!  I also picked up the super amazing tour program (the art is so awesome sauce) and a Gorillaz trucker hat (I like hats, kill me for being so 2004, plus they don't sell them online).  Bad thing: I lost my Kon coin purse after the concert, but I only lost about $30, but still, that's a lot for someone that's unemployed!

As for the songs, my favorites were the ones with videos I have never see before.  "To Binge" featured a video of a drain with beer going down it and the lyrics in Japanese (the beer even had fake labels in Japanese on them).  "Broken" featured Russel holding Noodle in his hand while she performed the melodica parts of the song.  And of course the dressing room indents were too funny (poor Murdoc, he couldn't open any door in that dressing room, including the one to the bathroom)!

Anyways, my sister took some video of the concert and I've got them up on YouTube for ya'll.  You can check them all out here:

I also tried to get a five from Kano and Bashy when then came into the crowd during "Clint Eastwood," but they both passed on me...Come on, can a sister get a break?

Well, the main thing was that I had a blast and the next day, I went to Denver again and at at CASA BONITA!  YAY CLIFF DIVERS!  For sure if the whole family goes back to Colorado again, we are all going to Casa Bonita!  It was too much fun and I really liked the food as well!  Plus they have Frogger in their arcade, so that pleases my nephew big time.

Alright, I got stuff to do today (well, my mom has stuff for me to do today), so see ya'll later!

Why D-Money now? What happened to D-Train?

Woah, two blog posts in one day!  That a record for me!

Well, this one is a story for you all.  It's the story about why I'm now using the nickname "D-Money" or "D$" for short.  And it is such an awesome sauce story that I don't know why I haven't told it yet!

So, let's go back to Aug. 27th, 2010.  Team Coco officially took over control of the "I'm With Coco" page on Facebook.  That night, we were wishing Mike Mitchell (he created the page and the now iconic "I'm With Coco" image) the best of luck and thanking him for all his hard work.  We were also welcoming in Aaron Bleyaert aka Bley, Conan's web guru guy, in as our new lord and master!

Eventually, around 2am on Aug 28th, Bley got into the IRC chatroom to chat with us!  I had never been in the chatroom when Bley was there, so I had to rush on over and get in there!  The chatting started with mostly questions to Bley, but there were some funny stories along the way.

Well, eventually, we all get to talking about Conan's spoken word vinyl, which is Conan's take on the story of Dr. Frankenstein (a must listen, it is seriously too funny).  So I started telling everyone about how the story inspired an idea to make a film about Benny (that's what Conan calls Frankenstein's monster) traveling the world to find the best latte in the world (Benny likes lattes, just so you know).  However, Benny instead finds true love with a young lady...but she gets hit by a train or something horrible like that.

Well, once I mentioned that she gets hit by a train, one of my Conan friends, Val, makes a remark about my nickname on Twitter, which was at the time d_train2002.  Bley doesn't get what she's talking about, so we have to remind him that it's my Twitter nickname.  Next thing you know, he's telling me that my nickname sounds like I'm taking a poop (not kidding here).

So I don't get at first what Bley means by this, so I tell him how I got the nickname.  See, I got it during my junior year of high school during the spring play.  I had a small part and was only in one scene.  Still, I had to do my fair share of set building like everyone else.  During set building, Jonny Hall, a guy that was in my grade and had a larger part in the play, just started to call me "D-Train."  He wouldn't stop!  Eventually, he got all the other guys in the play to call me "D-Train" and I had to sign the back of the sets and the drama club storage room wall as "D-Train" for the play.  Next thing you know, all the other guys at school start calling me "D-Train" and it stuck with me.

Well, Bley then tells me that Jonny must have never lived in New York City (which is true as we lived in Grafton, ND) and most likely didn't know all the jokes that can come out of a nickname like "D-Train."  At one point, Bley said something about the "D-Train" coming out the tunnel or going into the tunnel, which sounded more like, well, what a man might call his "unit."  Now "D-Train" was starting to feel dirty and I had never realized it until then.

So Bley, being the awesome sauce wizard that he is, suggests a new nickname for me, even though I'm unemployed.  He suggests "D-Money" or "D$" for short.  He thought it sounded cooler that "D-Train."  Everyone else in the chatroom did as well.  Some even said it's a good nickname for someone that will be getting a new job soon (still don't have that job yet).  So I made my decision then and there that "D-Train" was going to be semi-retired, but that my Twitter name would become D_Money2002.

I also decided that "D-Money" would need a different look that "D-Train."  Below are "D-Train" on the left, and "D-Money" on the right.


See, "D-Train" is a little more rock n' roll, somewhat goth, and not too fancy.  "D-Money" on the other hand is a little more hip-hop, more rock/movie/TV star, and glamorous.  I even made sure "D-Money" had a little orange on as well (her headband is orange, and her toes are painted orange, albeit hard to see).  As for the purse with the little fox in it, that was my homage to Bley, as he has the whole "silver fox" think going on with his hair on the top of his head. 

BTW, yes, I do like making Subeta avatars of myself and others.  Only problem is they don't have any good hair pieces that I could use for Conan, as well as no good beards.  They need more beards...

So, there ya go peeps!  The story behind "D-Money" in all its bam sauce glory!  And if Bley denies the story, tweet Conan and tell him he needs to give Bley another "Coco BeatDown."
So, did everyone enjoy the ranting and raving?  Yeah, just needed to get some stuff off my chest.  And after I wrote that, I went to my room and wrote a letter in my notebook to someone.  Don't know if I'll send it to them though...They may think that I'm creepy and want to put out a restraining order on me...Which I don't want.

Anywho, I don't know why I didn't figure this out sooner, but it did come to me!  So get this: my birthday is on May 8th.  Even better, I was born in 1983 and May 8th was Mother's Day.  How awesome is that?  Although my mom almost had me outside of the hospital as my dad left her outside when he went in to get a nurse or doctor.  Yeah, he didn't help her into the hospital, just up to the door!  And I'm the middle child!

Ok, so May 8th is my birthday, so that makes my half-birthday (6 months after your birthday) November 8th.  And this is the part of the blog where I go "What HUGE AWESOME SAUCE thing is happening on November 8th this year?"  I don't know how I missed it this long, but...


My half-birthday this year is on the same day that "Conan" premieres (yep, that's the name of the show; simple but oh so sweet)!  So, here's what I'm thinking about doing for my half-birthday (mind that it will be entirely Conan themed):

  • Wear my "I'm With Coco" t-shirt, wear some orange pants, orange shoes, my orange lei, and my orange bandana, even if I have a job then and it's not in the dress code.  Then again, I'm With Coco is a religious organization on Facebook so I could say it's a part of my religion.
  • Get a half-sheet cake with half an image of Conan on it.  I think I'll get the lower half of his body... Wait, I have to get his face...I have to eat the pomp and the beard...THAT WILL BE PIPED ONTO THE CAKE!  I'll have the Cake Boss or the Ace of Cakes guy make it as well.
  • Go to a bar with HD cable and ask the bartender to turn it to TBS on every screen, thus pissing everyone off, making them leave and I'm their only business...And I won't leave until they serve me every orange dish on the menu!  And if it's a Mexican place, it's pretty much every dish with cheese on it!
  • Rent an orange car for the day and put my Team Coco/I'm With Coco license place frame on it.
  • Interrupt people all day.
  • Wear my hair in a pomp, then get orange spray for my hair so I can be a red head for the day (so jealous that my sister got the red in the family).
  • Play "And They Call Me Mad?" all day...even at work...all day...and drink several lattes.
  • Do Conan's Ludacris impression all day whenever I talk to anyone.
  • Only talk about Conan on Twitter that day and only post Conan related images on Twitpic.  I'll most likely lose followers, but I'm okay with that.  If they can't handle an image like this, then I don't need them.
  • String dance whenever the phone rings or someone says my name.  I'll also respond by saying "Si, Yo soy Conando!"
  • Carry my tour poster with me everywhere I go.  I'll take it grocery shopping, to lunch, and we'll have a nice stroll in the park.
I think by the end of the day everyone will think I'm weird, but I can deal with that.  Although my parents did say I'm the most normal of all of us kids...don't know if that is a good thing.  I'll return to normal on November 9th (maybe, no guarantee on that).

Alright, time for me to go to bed.  I started watching Talladega Nights last night and I'm going to finish it.  Seriously, how many supporters of Team Coco are in that film?  Heck, Andy's in the film and he's a member of Team Coco!

Things that ANNOY me right now...

Yep, this is a list of things that are ANNOYING me right now.  Deal with it people.

And if you can't deal with it, then don't read it.  I mean it.

Seriously...you've been warned.
  • When you download a new song thinking that it will be the unedited version, yet they have edited it and you can't find the unedited version.  I download a few songs the other night and one has just one swear word in it (shit) and it was still bleeped out!
  • Gloomy, rainy days: It's officially fall in North Dakota and the gloominess just pisses me off and makes me feel like shit.  And right now, I don't want to feel like shit.
  • Not having a job...enough said.  *hiremeconanorcraigorstewbeeforcolbertmaybefallon*
  • When people you follow and never respond to on Twitter decide to BLOCK YOU!  I found out about 2 blocks within the last week.  One I think I know why they blocked me, but the other doesn't make any sense!  Twitter, you should have an appeals process for us to appeal the blocking because now I have to go to their profiles to find out what's going on with them AND I DON'T LIKE IT!
  • The possibility that I'm not going to be able to see my favorite band, Gorillaz, in October because I have no money.  I don't even have money for the plane ticket right now (I was going to go to Denver to see them with my sister who lives in Boulder; now she might get to and I might not).  Not to mention that I bought the tickets a few days before I LOST MY JOB!
  • Living with my parents...another reason I need to find a new job and hopefully one in Fargo/Moorhead SOON!  I have been having a lot of bad days since I lost my job, yet they still nag me to help out at home.  Why can't they just leave me alone on these days and not make me feel more like crap?  And why should I have to fold their clothes?  They don't do my laundry!
  • My cat wanting attention from me ALL THE TIME!  I move us back in with my parents and she is always wanting my attention!  She wasn't like this when it was just her and I, so I think she must have some jealousy with my parents' cat Anna.  Then again, Anna is just so fluffy and Ai just has short hair.  Plus, Anna never whines, while Ai does ALL THE TIME!  I think I may take Anna when I move out...
  • People comparing Brett Favre to Jay Leno.  Peeps, Leno pulled some deep shit to get TTS back, whereas Favre didn't have to come back at all.  Favre had a choice, Leno didn't so he became a bully to get his way.
  • The fact that almost all of the people I graduated high school with are either A) Getting married, are married, or have a long-term relationship, B) Have kids, or C) All of the above.  I don't know how many of them have gotten married this year, are going to be getting married soon, have been in long-term relationships, and/or have kids.  I think I'm going to be the only single person that's also never been on a date IN THEIR LIFE at our 10 yr. reunion.  And I will still be the one in the corner, not drinking alcohol, and leaving early.
  • That I'm not getting my unemployment money because my former employer has not gotten back to the unemployment insurance department yet.  Come on!  I need some money here!
  • Life in general...enough said.
So yeah, that felt good.  I needed that.  Sometimes you just need to rant.  But I really need to find a job outside of Grafton and Grand Forks soon...I really just want to get out of North Dakota, but it doesn't look like that is going to be happening any time soon.  I can settle with Fargo/Moorhead for a job...at LEAST they have a film scene down there!

I think I need a life change

Week 2 of unemployment is not going the greatest.  My mom (and dad) really wants me to figure out what I'm going to do now.  Only thing is, I just don't know what to do.  There are many options, I just don't know what would be best.  Here are some of my options right now:
  • Stay in Grafton for the winter and work here until spring, then move out: Pros to this are free rent, food, cable, and internet (thanks to my parents).  Cons are that I'm in Grafton, where there is nothing to do unless you have kids, and I would be living with my parents, plus cable is only basic and no way my parents would upgrade to HD, which I want before Nov. 8th.
  • Try to find a job in Fargo: I would like to move back to Fargo, but even when I had a job, I would apply for jobs in Fargo and here nothing back.  Or I would get the "Sorry, position filled." even though I submitted my resume like only a few days earlier.  I feel that they only want to hire people in Fargo or those that don't have a job.  Well, I don't have a job now, so maybe I could find a job that pays good and have good benefits in Fargo.
  • Try to find a job somewhere other than in North Dakota or Minnesota: Now this would most likely freak MY MOM out big time.  Say I apply for some jobs on the East or West coast and get one; man she would be worried about my safety big time.  But I have always kinda wanted to get out of the Midwest as it can be very boring here for a person like me.  But the only place the job market is good right now is where I'm living: the Upper Midwest.  And I don't have the money to move out east or west, but damnit, I so need a change of location bad.
  • Go back to college: I have thought about this before.  I wouldn't mind being like a social studies/history teacher or something like that.  But then again, that would only mean filling out FAFSA and having more student loans, which I really don't want to have.  Plus, I really don't know how I would feel going back to college now being I'm older and I know what it takes to do school work.  Then again, I could choose a college in a city outside of the Midwest, but then MY MOM would freak out about me living in a foreign place like California or Colorado.
One thing I do know is that I want to be somewhere where I can hang out with friends.  Moving out of the Upper Midwest would be great for me because I could find more people that are into things that I am into (anime, manga, sports, late night TV).  I want to be able to meet up with friends on the weekend to hang out.  That's why I keep thinking living on the East or West coast (and West coast would be preferred right now) would be a good change for me.  But who knows if that will happen.

I know this is a decision that I can't make lightly, or by myself.  There is going to be much discussion about this, especially with the parents, which I don't look forward to but it has to be done.  I'm just lost right now and need some guidance.  I'm still young and still need someone to give me a little lead in life.

Right now, I wish that I had one wish from a genie, just one.  I would simply wish for my dream job, and next thing you know, I'm at Studio 15 at the Warner Bros. lot in Burbank meeting my new tall, pale, red-headed boss.  But, I don't think there are any genies here in North Dakota, and I don't see many shooting stars, so I guess I'll keep wishing on airplanes.

Didn't get to say goodbye...

Well, life hasn't been treating me that fair lately.  As many of you know, I lost my job last week.  I never thought that I would leave Amazon like that; I always thought I would get to put my 2 weeks in and send out an e-mail to the floor letting everyone know how fun it was working with everyone.  But that didn't happen.

Now, some of you most likely would like to know how I lost my job, but that is something I'm going to leave that to the rumor mill to try and figure that out.  The truth is between myself, my former supervisors, the site manager, and the HR manager.  And don't go bothering them about it.  Although, you may want to bother them about WHY I didn't receive the awards I won over the years back or my quad signs (I had 2 and got neither Kip Dynamite or Conan O'Brien ones back).

Anyways, this is my goodbye to Amazon.  It was a fun 3 years, albeit a tough 3 years at times.  But I got to work with some awesome people, most of whom I will not forget!  Also, I got to put whatever picture that was HR appropriate on my desktop screen.  When I started, it was my nephew, then Bleach, then Gorillaz, and ending with Conan O'Brien.  Yes, the Bleach pictures I had up were HR appropriate.

To my supervisor, you really helped me a lot and you knew how to make me laugh when I was down.  Then again, you would tease me for being a Minnesota Twins fan, but since the majority of people in the building were as well, you didn't stand a chance of winning.

Well, for those of you that know how to get a hold of me, you know what to do.  I'm on Facebook, I'm on Twitter, and I'm on both sites everyday.  Seriously, I am always on Facebook and Twitter.  The only time I'm usually not on is when I'm sleeping!

As for my future, that is undecided at this point.  I would like to move back to Fargo/Moorhead, but I would need to find a job there first.  I have moved back home with my parents (again, I know) and may stay in Grafton and find some part-time work.  Free rent, free cable, free internet, how can you beat that (well, HD cable would be nice, but my parents don't have an HDTV so they have no need for it)?  That way, I would be able to save up my money to move back to Fargo/Moorhead if I got a job there.

Heck, you never know...Maybe I'll be moving out west to Los Angeles sooner than I thought in hopes of getting a job in my college degree's field (Film Studies grad).  HELL!  Maybe I will get that dream job of mine, working for Conan O'Brien!  I do wonder if he got my resume...

So, that's it.  Goodbye Amazon.  I'm not going to stop shopping from you either, although I will miss my employee discount a lot come holiday time.  As for selling, well, I don't know what I'm going to do with that account.  I haven't sold much lately, so I may just give it up.  But I'm still buying, just once I get money again...



Darci "D-Money" Frederickson

Latest Month

June 2011



RSS Atom
Powered by LiveJournal.com
Designed by Lilia Ahner